Convert To Islam Issues- A 17 YR OLD NEW MUSLIM WONDERING ABOUT HIJAB OR NO HIJAB
As Salaamu Alaikum .
My name is Ameena and i converted to Islam yesterday (3rd of December 2007) but my family doesn't know.
Since they don't know I am a new Muslim I don't wear Hijab . The reason I won't tell them is because they don't believe in Muslim beliefs and every time I try to tell them something about Islam they say really stupid stuff.
I want to wear my Hijab but I don't know if I should because of my family's beliefs
Ameena (Florida )
As salaamu Alaikum Sister Ameena.
Praise be to Allah who has guided you to Islam. It brings me great joy to hear that you have become Muslim and our New Sister in Islam. So congratulations on your conversion. Most converts want to tell their family about Islam and cannot understand why they do not share in their joy and understand the beauty of Islam.
The answer is their hearts are sealed. Only those whose hearts are illuminated with the light of Islam can feel the way you feel. The joy and the love that fills the heart of the person whose heart the light of Islam has penetrated is amazing. Talking to a persons whose heart the light of Islam has not penetrated is like talking to a blind man how has never seen something and you can only try to describe what you have seen and pray that they understand the beauty you are seeing and Allah opens their hearts to Islam, and guides them to Islam.
Call them to Islam with nice manners and wisdom. Like the Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him called his relatives to Islam and like the Prophet Ibraheem called his father to worship Allah alone.
Just like the prophets, do not compromise on Islam when calling them to Islam we too should not compromise. A common mistake made by Muslims of today is that whilst calling their relatives or others to Islam they end up loosing their own Islam though compromising and rejecting that parts of Islam that may not be palatable to the non- Muslims.
When Allah choose Islam to be the religion for whole of Humanity, He did not ask for any suggestions from anyone nor did he permit people to have a say in His affairs. Likewise when it has arrived in it its completed form to humanity no one had a say in it. Allah does not allow anyone to change Islam nor dilute it nor add their own bits to it.
If they deserve guidance, they will be guided to Islam and you will receive great joy and also a great reward for calling them to Islam.
One very important thing to remember is that whenever some one converts to Islam. They are tested with trials to see how firm they are on Islam.
Allah says in Surah Al-Ankabut
[These letters are one of the miracles of the Qur'ân, and none but Allâh (Alone) knows their meanings.]
Do people think that they will be left alone because they say: "We believe," and will not be tested.
And We indeed tested those who were before them. And Allâh will certainly make (it) known (the truth of) those who are true, and will certainly make (it) known (the falsehood of) those who are liars, (although Allâh knows all that before putting them to test).
Or those who do evil deeds think that they can outstrip Us (i.e. escape Our Punishment)? Evil is that which they judge!
Whoever hopes for the Meeting with Allâh, then Allâh's Term is surely coming. and He is the All-Hearer, the All-Knower.
And whosoever strives, he strives only for himself. Verily, Allâh is free of all wants from the 'Alamîn (mankind, jinns, and all that exists).
Those who believe [in the Oneness of Allâh (Monotheism) and in the Messenger Muhammad peace be upon him, and do not apostate because of the harm they receive from the polytheists], and do righteous good deeds, surely, We shall remit from them their evil deeds and shall reward them according to the best of that which they used to do.
And We have enjoined on man to be good and dutiful to his parents, but if they strive to make you join with Me (in worship) anything (as a partner) of which you have no knowledge, then obey them not. Unto Me is your return, and I shall tell you what you used to do.
And for those who believe (in the Oneness of Allâh and other items of Faith) and do righteous good deeds, surely, We shall make them enter in (the entrance of) the righteous (i.e. in Paradise).
Of mankind are some who say: "We believe in Allâh," but if they are made to suffer for the sake of Allâh, they consider the trial of mankind as Allâh's punishment, and if victory comes from your Lord, (the hypocrites) will say: "Verily! We were with you (helping you)." Is not Allâh Best Aware of what is in the breast of the 'Alamîn (mankind and jinns).
Verily, Allâh knows those who believe, and verily, He knows the hypocrites [i.e. Allâh will test the people with good and hard days to discriminate the good from the wicked (although Allâh knows all that before putting them to test)].
And those who disbelieve say to those who believe: "Follow our way and we will verily bear your sins," never will they bear anything of their sins. Surely, they are liars.
And verily, they shall bear their own loads, and other loads besides their own, and verily, they shall be questioned on the Day of Resurrection about that which they used to fabricate. (quran 29:1-13)
Allah again tells the Sahabah (companions of the Prophet peace be upon him)
Do you think that you shall be left alone while Allâh has not yet tested those among you who have striven hard and fought and have not taken Walîjah [(Batanah - helpers, advisors and consultants from disbelievers, pagans, etc.) giving openly to them their secrets] besides Allâh and His Messenger, and the believers. Allâh is Well-Acquainted with what you do. (Quran 9;16)
Allah also says
Do you think that you will enter Paradise before Allâh tests those of you who fought (in His Cause) and (also) tests those who are As-Sâbirin (the patient ones, etc.)? (Quran 3:142)
The Prophet peace be upon him and the Sahabah went through many very difficulties. Like the difficulties that some are going through right now.
No one will be tested beyond their capabilities. Those who are tested the most are those whom Allah loves the most. So that He can reward them the most. It is only fair that those who go through the most hardships undergo the most and strongest tests. Allah tested the Prophets the most and they went through very difficult tests and after that the pious were tested the most and they stayed firm on their Islam
The trials you may go through may be very small or may be very big depending on what you can handle. Many converts Sisters face trials such as people mocking them for the way they look or because they try to tell others the Haq (truth). Or simply because they say we are Muslims.
The Prophet peace be upon him and the Sahabah were mocked, starved, had their possessions and even families taken away from them. They were in a very weak position but Allah is all powerful and after many years of remaining firm and thus passing that part of the test. Allah granted them victory over the Non- Muslims even though they were so few and lightly armed. Allah shows in the next verses of Surah Ankabut his promise of saving the believers and giving them victory over huge, powerful armies.
And indeed We sent Nûh (Noah) to his people, and he stayed among them a thousand years less fifty years [inviting them to believe in the Oneness of Allâh (Monotheism), and discard the false gods and other deities], and the Deluge overtook them while they were Zâlimûn (wrong-doers, polytheists, disbelievers, etc.).
Then We saved him and those with him in the ship, and made it (the ship) as an Ayâh (a lesson, a warning, etc.) for the 'Alamîn (mankind, jinns and all that exists).
And (remember) Ibrâhim (Abraham) when he said to his people: "Worship Allâh (Alone), and fear Him, that is better for you if you did but know.
"You worship besides Allâh only idols, and you only invent falsehood. Verily, those whom you worship besides Allâh have no power to give you provision, so seek your provision from Allâh (Alone), and worship Him (Alone), and be grateful to Him. To Him (Alone) you will be brought back.
"And if you deny, then nations before you have denied (their Messengers). And the duty of the Messenger is only to convey (the Message) plainly."
See they not how Allâh originates creation, then repeats it. Verily, that is easy for Allâh.
Say: "Travel in the land and see how (Allâh) originated creation, and then Allâh will bring forth (resurrect) the creation of the Hereafter (i.e. resurrection after death). Verily, Allâh is Able to do all things."
He punishes whom He will, and shows mercy to whom He will, and to Him you will be returned.
And you cannot escape in the earth or in the heaven. And besides Allâh you have neither any Walî (Protector or Guardian) nor any Helper.
And those who disbelieve in the Ayât (proofs, evidences, verses, lessons, signs, revelations, etc.) of Allâh and the Meeting with Him, it is they who have no hope of My Mercy, and it is they who will (have) a painful torment.
So nothing was the answer of [Ibrahîm's (Abraham)] people except that they said: "Kill him or burn him." Then Allâh saved him from the fire. Verily, in this are indeed signs for a people who believe.
And [Ibrâhim (Abraham)] said: "You have taken (for worship) idols instead of Allâh, and the love between you is only in the life of this world, but on the Day of Resurrection, you shall disown each other, and curse each other, and your abode will be the Fire, and you shall have no helper."
So Lout (Lot) believed in him [Ibrâhim's (Abraham) Message of Islâmic Monotheism]. He [Ibrâhim (Abraham)] said: "I will emigrate for the sake of my Lord. Verily, He is the All-Mighty, the All-Wise."
And We bestowed on him [Ibrâhim (Abraham)], Ishâque (Isaac) and Ya'qûb (Jacob), and ordained among his offspring Prophethood and the Book [i.e. the Taurât (Torah) (to Mûsa Moses), the Injeel (Gospel) (to 'Iesa Jesus), the Qur'ân (to Muhammad peace be upon him ), all from the offspring of Ibrâhim (Abraham)], and We granted him his reward in this world, and verily, in the Hereafter he is indeed among the righteous.
And (remember) Lout (Lot), when he said to his people: "You commit Al-Fâhishah (sodomy the worst sin) which none has preceded you in (committing) it in the 'Alamîn (mankind and jinns)."
"Verily, you do sodomy with men, and rob the wayfarer (travellers, etc.)! And practise Al-Munkar (disbelief and polytheism and every kind of evil wicked deed) in your meetings." But his people gave no answer except, that they said: "Bring Allâh's Torment upon us if you are one of the truthful."
He said: "My Lord! Give me victory over the people who are Mufsidûn (those who commit great crimes and sins, oppressors, tyrants, mischief-makers, corrupts).
And when Our Messengers came to Ibrâhim (Abraham) with the glad tidings they said: "Verily, we are going to destroy the people of this [Lout's (Lot's)] town (i.e. the town of Sodom in Palestine) truly, its people have been Zâlimûn [wrong-doers, polytheists and disobedient to Allâh, and have also belied their Messenger Lout (Lot)]."
Ibrâhim (Abraham) said: "But there is Lout (Lot) in it." They said:"We know better who is there, we will verily save him [Lout (Lot)] and his family, except his wife, she will be of those who remain behind (i.e. she will be destroyed along with those who will be destroyed from her folk)."
And when Our Messengers came to Lout (Lot), he was grieved because of them, and felt straitened on their account. They said: "Have no fear, and do not grieve! Truly, we shall save you and your family, except your wife, she will be of those who remain behind (i.e. she will be destroyed along with those who will be destroyed from her folk).
Verily, we are about to bring down on the people of this town a great torment from the sky, because they have been rebellious (against Allâh's Command)."
And indeed We have left thereof an evident Ayâh (a lesson and a warning and a sign the place where the Dead Sea is now in Palestine) for a folk who understand.
And to (the people of) Madyan (Midian), We sent their brother Shu'aib (Shuaib). He said: "O my people! Worship Allâh, and hope for (the reward of good deeds by worshipping Allâh Alone, on) the last Day, and commit no mischief on the earth as Mufsidûn (those who commit great crimes, oppressors, tyrants, mischief-makers, corrupts).
And they belied him [Shu'aib (Shuaib)], so the earthquake seized them, and they lay (dead), prostrate in their dwellings.
And 'Ad and Thamûd (people)! And indeed (their destruction) is clearly apparent to you from their (ruined) dwellings. Shaitân (Satan) made their deeds fair-seeming to them, and turned them away from the (Right) Path, though they were intelligent.
And (We destroyed also) Qârûn (Korah), Fir'aun (Pharaoh), and Hâmân. And indeed Mûsa (Moses) came to them with clear Ayât (proofs, evidences, verses, lessons, signs, revelations, etc.), but they were arrogant in the land, yet they could not outstrip Us (escape Our punishment).
So We punished each (of them) for his sins, of them were some on whom We sent Hâsiban (a violent wind with shower of stones) [as the people of Lout (Lot)], and of them were some who were overtaken by AsSaihah [torment awful cry, etc. (as Thamûd or Shu'aib's people)], and of them were some whom We caused the earth to swallow [as Qârûn (Korah)], and of them were some whom We drowned [as the people of Nûh (Noah), or Fir'aun (Pharaoh) and his people]. It was not Allâh Who wronged them, but they wronged themselves.
The likeness of those who take Auliyâ' (protectors and helpers) other than Allâh is as the likeness of a spider, who builds (for itself) a house, but verily, the frailest (weakest) of houses is the spider's house; if they but knew.
Verily, Allâh knows what things they invoke instead of Him. He is the All-Mighty, the All-Wise.
And these similitude’s We put forward for mankind, but none will understand them except those who have knowledge (of Allâh and His Signs, etc.).
(Allâh says to His Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him ): "Allâh (Alone) created the heavens and the earth with truth (and none shared Him in their creation)." Verily! Therein is surely a sign for those who believe.
Recite (O Muhammad peace be upon him ) what has been revealed to you of the Book (the Qur'ân), and perform As-Salât (IqamâtasSalât). Verily, As-Salât (the prayer) prevents from Al-Fahshâ' (i.e. great sins of every kind, unlawful sexual intercourse, etc.) and Al-Munkar (i.e. disbelief, polytheism, and every kind of evil wicked deed, etc.) and the remembering (praising, etc.) of (you by) Allâh (in front of the angels) is greater indeed [than your remembering (praising, etc.) Allâh in prayers, etc.]. And Allâh knows what you do.
And argue not with the people of the Scripture (Jews and Christians), unless it be in (a way) that is better (with good words and in good manner, inviting them to Islâmic Monotheism with His Verses), except with such of them as do wrong, and say (to them): "We believe in that which has been revealed to us and revealed to you; our Ilâh (God) and your Ilâh (God) is One (i.e. Allâh), and to Him we have submitted (as Muslims)."
And thus We have sent down the Book (i.e this Qur'an) to you (O Muhammad peace be upon him ), and those whom We gave the Scripture [the Taurât (Torah) and the Injeel (Gospel) aforetime] believe therein as also do some of these (who are present with you now like 'Abdullâh bin Salâm) and none but the disbelievers reject Our Ayât [(proofs, signs, verses, lessons, etc., and deny Our Oneness of Lordship and Our Oneness of worship and Our Oneness of Our Names and Qualities: i.e. Islâmic Monotheism)].
Neither did you (O Muhammad peace be upon him ) read any book before it (this Qur'ân), nor did you write any book (whatsoever) with your right hand. In that case, indeed, the followers of falsehood might have doubted.
Nay, but they, the clear Ayât [i.e the description and the qualities of Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him written like verses in the Taurât (Torah) and the Injeel (Gospel)] are preserved in the breasts of those who have been given knowledge (from the people of the Scriptures). And none but the Zâlimûn (polytheists and wrongdoers, etc.) deny Our Ayât (proofs, evidences, verses, lessons, signs, revelations, etc.).
And they say: "Why are not signs sent down to him from his Lord? Say: "The signs are only with Allâh, and I am only a plain warner."
Is it not sufficient for them that We have sent down to you the Book (the Qur'ân) which is recited to them? Verily, herein is mercy and a reminder (or an admonition) for a people who believe.
Say (to them O Muhammad peace be upon him ): "Sufficient is Allâh for a witness between me and you. He knows what is in the heavens and on earth." And those who believe in Bâtil (all false deities other than Allâh), and disbelieve in Allâh and (in His Oneness), it is they who are the losers.
And they ask you to hasten on the torment (for them), and had it not been for a term appointed, the torment would certainly have come to them. And surely, it will come upon them suddenly while they perceive not!
They ask you to hasten on the torment. And verily! Hell, of a surety, will encompass the disbelievers.
On the Day when the torment (Hell-fire) shall cover them from above them and from underneath their feet, and it will be said: "Taste what you used to do."
O My slaves who believe! Certainly, spacious is My earth. Therefore worship Me (Alone)."
Everyone shall taste the death. Then unto Us you shall be returned.
And those who believe (in the Oneness of Allâh Islâmic Monotheism) and do righteous good deeds, to them We shall surely give lofty dwellings in Paradise, underneath which rivers flow, to live therein forever. Excellent is the reward of the workers.
Those who are patient, and put their trust (only) in their Lord (Allâh).
And so many a moving (living) creature there is, that carries not its own provision! Allâh provides for it and for you. And He is the All-Hearer, the AllKnower.
If you were to ask them: "Who has created the heavens and the earth and subjected the sun and the moon?" They will surely reply: "Allâh." How then are they deviating (as polytheists and disbelievers)?
Allâh enlarges the provision for whom He wills of His slaves, and straitens it for whom (He wills). Verily, Allâh is the AllKnower of everything.
If you were to ask them: "Who sends down water (rain) from the sky, and gives life therewith to the earth after its death?" They will surely reply: "Allâh." Say: "All the praises and thanks be to Allâh!" Nay! Most of them have no sense.
And this life of the world is only amusement and play! Verily, the home of the Hereafter, that is the life indeed (i.e. the eternal life that will never end), if they but knew
And when they embark on a ship, they invoke Allâh, making their Faith pure for Him only, but when He brings them safely to land, behold, they give a share of their worship to others.
So that they become ingrate for that which We have given them, and that they take their enjoyment (as a warning and a threat), but they will come to know.
Have they not seen that We have made (Makkah) a sanctuary secure, and that men are being snatched away from all around them? Then do they believe in Bâtil (falsehood - polytheism, idols and all deities other than Allâh), and deny (become ingrate for) the Graces of Allâh?
And who does more wrong than he who invents a lie against Allâh or denies the truth (Muhammad peace be upon him and his doctrine of Islâmic Monotheism and this Qur'ân), when it comes to him? Is there not a dwelling in Hell for disbelievers (in the Oneness of Allâh and in His Messenger Muhammad peace be upon him )?
As for those who strive hard in Us (Our Cause), We will surely guide them to Our Paths (i.e. Allâh's Religion - Islâmic Monotheism). And verily, Allâh is with the Muhsinûn (good doers)." (Quran 14-69)
When people are nasty to the Muslims . The true Muslim only increases in faith. There was a story of some brothers who were not practising Islam. They used to do many unIslamic things. They went to Afghanistan for a holiday but due to the bombings by the evil forces of Kuffar they got trapped there and eventually found themselvesin captivity in Afghanistan. Then sent to Guantanamo bay were they subjected to humiliation and torture. One of the reason for this humiliation and torture is to make them loose their faith. Throughout history and even in present times, the enemies of Islam have believed that if the Muslims are humiliated and tortured they will leave Islam and choose democracy and/or Christianity.
This is what they saw happen to non Muslim countries whom they humiliated with defeat such as the Japanese. Two Atom bombs were dropped and they all lost hope and as one Christian guy says they did cultural suicide (i.e. they the Japanese started adopting the values and culture more and more of the victories country).
However the Kaffir and Munafic (hypocrite) physiology does not apply to Muslims. Those whose hearts are filled with a true love of Islam. They increase in their belief whenever they are attacked because of their belief in Islam..
These three Pakistani British brothers went into Guantanamo bay beardless and came out as better Muslims. One of them said it is the best thing that has happened to him because the awful experience was a trigger for him to think deeply more deeply of this life and the next life.
The life of luxury and ease can be the life of destruction for most people. It may cause them to go to hell as they are too busy with the worldly life and when death approaches them they find they have done nothing for their hereafter. Actually in many cases they even try to hinder others from practicing Islam.
So do not let what people say or behave towards you distract you from your mission to be the best Muslimah you can be and to thus please your Allah.
An English convert sisters who wore the full Islamic Dress (khymar,jilbab, niqab etc) both at university and at work was once pushed by a Kaffir (non Muslim) man whilst shopping. She fell down but rather than being afraid of wearing Islamic clothing she said she felt even more determined to wear her Islamic clothing.
This was a test for her and Alhamdulillah she passed. .
This life is short. The next world is for eternity. Allah has prepared amaing things for the true Muslims what no eye has ever seen. We could not even imagine the amazing and wonderful things that are there waiting for the Muslims in heaven. A place were there is total peace and joy. Were there is no death, poverty, hunger, homelessness and zero boredom.
May Allah keep your heart and our heart firm on Islam and grant us Paradise. Ameen.
As for wearing Islamic clothing. This is a must, just like prayer is a must. You should try to wear it even if they dislike you wearing it. Tell you self that you fear no one but Allah and you wish to please your Rabb (Lord ) and will do whatever it takes to please your Rabb (Lord).
Some new Muslimswho are from Sikh or Hindus families sometimes have to hide their conversion because their families will murder them. In their cases we may have advice them to hide their Islam until they can run away to safety. However in most other cases a converts life is not at stake and thus one should start to practice Islam openly.
So my advice for you is to start practicing your Islam openly. If they mock you or insult you then just spent more time away from them such as in your room or with friends who are understanding. If you can find such friends.
Therefore, ideally you should start to observe hijab right away whenever you are outside or if there are non-Mehrem men inside your house . That is men who are not your Father, Grand fathers, Brothers, Nephews, Mothers brothers or Fathers brothers.
Also please note Hijab is not just a scarf on the head. It involves covering the whole body. Making sure that your curves are not visible. Please a read articles on hijab on this linkwww.muslimconverts.com/hijab
Some New Muslims are able to dress Islamically right away. Others it takes quite a while. This all depends on how strong your Iman is. Eventually Iman gets stronger and stronger with more learning and praying and adopting the Islamic way of life becomes easier and easier.
May Allah make it easy for you to practice your religion and the sooner you start wearing hijab the better it will be for you.
So be prepared for tests and if they come your way then be grateful that Allah has chosen you to earn greater rewards than others. Many youngsters want to go to high school and then to collage/university even though they know it will mean studying very hard and going through great pressure and anxiety. Yet they do it in the hope of eventually getting a better job or a better career. So if people can do all that for this short life then surely we should be willing to try even harder for the next life
If you have any questions or problems then please email.
May Allah make things easy for you
Your Brother in Islam